In Search Of...
No this is not that kind of "In Search Of..." you may have found in the newspaper or on the Russian Brides website. I am in search of something much more complicated... my birthparents.
Many of you may know that I am the eldest of what is left of my family. My dad committed suicide when I was 6 via auto fumes. My brother committed suicide when I was 12 via shotgun. My step-father died of an aging heart in 1999. My mother died of a aging body in 2003 and my sister died from a lost battle with cancer in 2012. All of my aunt and uncles have passed and I don't really keep in touch with my cousins. Needless to say, I am the eldest of my family at the ripe age of 46.
I was adopted. On October 18, 1966 I was given birth in Los Angeles County, California. I was immediately place for adoption. I realize that the possibility of finding my birthparents is not the best but I do have a head start. For years I did my own research and have found clues to my parents. My mother also was considerate enough to write down everything she knew right after the adoption in a letter that was left to me after her death. My mother has always been forthright about my adoption and I thank her for it. I know others who did not know until they were full-grown adults and it really messed them up.
Some of the information I think I have correctly is I was born Baby Boy Stone on October 18, 1966. The California record says that Baby Boy Stone was born to father "LR Stone" and mother "Ashlock". Since I have a math and science mind and this was definitely not a nurtured trait, I looked for any Engineer licenses. There was a hit for LR Stone. I was always told that my birthparents met from my mother attending at University and my father teaching. I started looking through as many records regarding universities in southern California as I could find without any luck for 1965/1966. I am hoping they will digitize it soon.
Both of my birthparents are supposed to be Native American. birthmother is Cherokee, birthfather is Sioux. Started looking for that as well with no luck.
Then it was pure happenstance that I was in San Francisco bay are doing a SharePoint Saturday East Bay presentation and I pulled up my browser realizing that there was a large Native American group in the area and searched for records of marriage regarding Ashlock... around the same age as my birthmother. I found one. She also stated that my birthmother was married to another man besides my birthfather. So I had to look for divorces first. I immediately started pulling up directories and locators to find out more about this person. She had older kids... well, my mom did say I was not the first child my birthmother had so that fits so far.
This Ashlock woman worked at an camping facility next to a lake. I immediately pulled up the facility and started combing through the photos looking for a familiar face. Maybe enough traits that I would recognize her before trying to approach or call her. I did not find her. I did find something that shocked me however. On the back of a jet-ski, was a picture of me with another woman. I was stunned. I immediately pulled open my email and sent Andi a link to the page and the picture itself. Within seconds I get a call with "What are you doing on that jet-ski and who is that woman?" That convinced me that I was not seeing just what I wanted to see and I clarified for Andi that it was not me and I was looking for my birthmother. She looked long and hard at the photo and swore it was me.
Thoughts ran through my head as to how this person could be tied to me. Could it be a birthbrother and the reason he is on the website is because of my birthmother?
I called her. No answer so I left a voicemail. I told her who I was and explained my purpose. She called me about an 1 1/2 hours later. At first she was very composed as I asked her some basic questions. Then I started asking her about her history. She paused for a moment after each question. I asked her about the photo of the man on the jet-ski. This was a longer pause as I think she may have been taken off guard by my question first, and then when she responded, there was a slight tightening in her throat. It seemed like a tell to me, but without seeing her face, that was not easy to determine either. She immediately said that she has an uncle that may be able to help as he knows the entire family tree and may be able to fill in the holes. I said that is fine and if she thinks up someone that may fit my requirement, to please call me.
Her uncle called me later that day. He knew nothing.
I think she was hiding something. There were too many coincidences for this and I really have a hard time with that many coincidences in one place. I guess it is possible that she never told her kids, her new husband and such and this would be considerably more drama than she was prepared to handle.
It has been 2 1/2 years and I think I am ready to find them both.
Many of you may know that I am the eldest of what is left of my family. My dad committed suicide when I was 6 via auto fumes. My brother committed suicide when I was 12 via shotgun. My step-father died of an aging heart in 1999. My mother died of a aging body in 2003 and my sister died from a lost battle with cancer in 2012. All of my aunt and uncles have passed and I don't really keep in touch with my cousins. Needless to say, I am the eldest of my family at the ripe age of 46.
I was adopted. On October 18, 1966 I was given birth in Los Angeles County, California. I was immediately place for adoption. I realize that the possibility of finding my birthparents is not the best but I do have a head start. For years I did my own research and have found clues to my parents. My mother also was considerate enough to write down everything she knew right after the adoption in a letter that was left to me after her death. My mother has always been forthright about my adoption and I thank her for it. I know others who did not know until they were full-grown adults and it really messed them up.
Some of the information I think I have correctly is I was born Baby Boy Stone on October 18, 1966. The California record says that Baby Boy Stone was born to father "LR Stone" and mother "Ashlock". Since I have a math and science mind and this was definitely not a nurtured trait, I looked for any Engineer licenses. There was a hit for LR Stone. I was always told that my birthparents met from my mother attending at University and my father teaching. I started looking through as many records regarding universities in southern California as I could find without any luck for 1965/1966. I am hoping they will digitize it soon.
Both of my birthparents are supposed to be Native American. birthmother is Cherokee, birthfather is Sioux. Started looking for that as well with no luck.
Then it was pure happenstance that I was in San Francisco bay are doing a SharePoint Saturday East Bay presentation and I pulled up my browser realizing that there was a large Native American group in the area and searched for records of marriage regarding Ashlock... around the same age as my birthmother. I found one. She also stated that my birthmother was married to another man besides my birthfather. So I had to look for divorces first. I immediately started pulling up directories and locators to find out more about this person. She had older kids... well, my mom did say I was not the first child my birthmother had so that fits so far.
This Ashlock woman worked at an camping facility next to a lake. I immediately pulled up the facility and started combing through the photos looking for a familiar face. Maybe enough traits that I would recognize her before trying to approach or call her. I did not find her. I did find something that shocked me however. On the back of a jet-ski, was a picture of me with another woman. I was stunned. I immediately pulled open my email and sent Andi a link to the page and the picture itself. Within seconds I get a call with "What are you doing on that jet-ski and who is that woman?" That convinced me that I was not seeing just what I wanted to see and I clarified for Andi that it was not me and I was looking for my birthmother. She looked long and hard at the photo and swore it was me.
Thoughts ran through my head as to how this person could be tied to me. Could it be a birthbrother and the reason he is on the website is because of my birthmother?
I called her. No answer so I left a voicemail. I told her who I was and explained my purpose. She called me about an 1 1/2 hours later. At first she was very composed as I asked her some basic questions. Then I started asking her about her history. She paused for a moment after each question. I asked her about the photo of the man on the jet-ski. This was a longer pause as I think she may have been taken off guard by my question first, and then when she responded, there was a slight tightening in her throat. It seemed like a tell to me, but without seeing her face, that was not easy to determine either. She immediately said that she has an uncle that may be able to help as he knows the entire family tree and may be able to fill in the holes. I said that is fine and if she thinks up someone that may fit my requirement, to please call me.
Her uncle called me later that day. He knew nothing.
I think she was hiding something. There were too many coincidences for this and I really have a hard time with that many coincidences in one place. I guess it is possible that she never told her kids, her new husband and such and this would be considerably more drama than she was prepared to handle.
It has been 2 1/2 years and I think I am ready to find them both.
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