I am in Shape...Round is a Shape

I have been eating entirely too much since my visit home. Tomorrow, as I head back to Virginia I will be boarding the plane considerably heavier and rounder than last Thursday when I arrived. Knowing the NTSB and all of their new-fangled scanner apparatuses, they have considered my weight leaving the plane in Chicago and will throw up some red flag when I go to board the plane.

"Warning! The passenger has gained 40 pounds in a week. He MUST have a cavity search to find out what he is hiding." I hope they use the lube this time...

I have actually been pretty lucky when it comes to the airport. As long as you know what you can and can't take on the plane, avoid carrying explosives, and wear easily slip-on shoes, you can move through rather quickly. The fact that I tend to fly the same airline every time and buy round-trip tickets doesn't hurt either.

This brings me to my point (as I almost always have one). If you are going to be the person that stands there and argues with the air marshalls, drive. For some reason, the line I tend to get assigned in security always has the Texas traveller that has never flown on a plane before and doesn't understand why he can't carry his fully loaded hand-gun in carry-on luggage. He will insist that the airline is going to hurt his $50 1973 Colt 45 and will have every weapon in the airport pulled out and pointing at him...with me in the line of fire somewhere.

"Dammit, Washington DC is a dangerous place. I am a card carrying member of the NRA (National Rifle Association) and it is my RIGHT to take my weapon with me. I have a permit!"

Ohhhh...the right to bear arms...another blog entry entirely.

Well, I am going to go to the movies. I will definitely get a large popcorn with extra butter.

Did you know...

A calorie is a unit of measurement for energy. A small calorie (the size measured for food) approximates the energy needed to increase the temperature of 1 gram of water by 1 °C.

Comments

Anonymous said…
;) me too gained few pounds (not def that 40 pounds range) after going home for xmas vacation!
2:41 AM
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