John Burkholder

Each year I struggle to answer a few questions (I always have questions). What makes January 1 the first day of the year? Why aren't we using a clock and time system that makes more sense? Why aren't we using the Chinese or Aztec calendar? As many of you know, this year we will have 1 entire extra second. For those who don't know...um...we get an extra second this year, so if you have a quartz watch, fix it. When you ask? Well, for you in the Central time zone (such as me), it is at 1:00PM today! Here is how it works. Today, my clock ticks: 12:59:5812:59:5912:59:601:00:00 How often does this happen you ask? About once every 18 months. Why? because when the Roman Catholic church put what we use as a calendar together, they were off. Fact is, they were off a lot! This is not the first Roman calendar either. We actually use the Gregorian calendar. Now for the quick history lesson... The Roman Calendar When Rome emerged as a world power, the difficulties of making a calendar we

When I moved to the Chicagoland area I was asked one question all the time. "Cubs or Sox?" Well, my answer is "for what?" I am not a big baseball fan although the White Sox winning the World Series was fun. Fact is, there are very few sports I really enjoy watching. The key word here is watching. I like to bowl, but I don't like watching. I mean lets face it, golf is boring as hell to watch on TV. In my best golf announcer voice "the ball is about 20 feet from the hole with a 2 degree slant to the left. I hope he doesn't hit it too hard..." Could it be Baseball? Football? Soccer? Basketball? Golf? Curling? Swimming? no it's Hockey! Ice Hockey to be specific. Fact is, I had the opportunity to see the Cubs and White Sox many times and declined. I am not interested in sitting in a freezing cold football stadium either. Why ice hockey? Lets think of the talent, and physical and mental abilities involved with ice hockey. First, people have to stand

Ok, I am sitting here in bed and trying to watch Without a Trace. For the past month though the sound is every so slightly, ok, very annoying. The bass work great, the treble works great, the problem is everything in the middle. The background music is clear but the voices are pretty much non-existent. So, we turn up the volume to hear the show and when the commercials come on, it sounds like a Klaxon screaming to run for cover. It is really nice when d-d-d-d-d-Dora is on TV. They have songs every 5 minutes. So, the question now becomes, eBay, WalMart or Best Buy. I really have not purchased a TV in so long, the last one I bought wasn't stereo sound. There are too many choices now. I remember having to choose between stereo and mono sound, black and white or color. Now there are sizes from 15 to 71 inches, tube, plasma, LCD, projection and DLP with or without DVD, computer input, S-Video, composite video... I don't know. I can manage to run a set of networks for billions of dol

It truly amazes me when people come up with new, ingenious ideas and actually turn them into something. As you can see from my previous posts, I use Reuters Oddly Enough as one of my main feeds. There are a couple of reasons for this. One, it is not usually the depressing news you normally see. Two, the articles make me laugh and think. Which brings me to one of todays articles about thinking outside the box. I have had many money making ideas which have not or will not come to fruition. Some are unattainable because they require money, of which I have very little. The other reason is because I am behind the gun and someone already did it. For instance, before Amazon.com became the goliath of an online store it is now, one of my ideas was create an Amazon type mall called Mall.com. At that time, the name had not yet been taken and I built an entire business plan. Well, three things happened. I didn't register the webspace. I didn't build the website. Amazon beat me to it. Yeah,

Over the past week, my wife called a family meeting to discuss what we plan to do over the next year. What this means is she wants a plan. I am not terribly big on plans for life, although I think she may be on to something this time. Since November 24, 2004 I have been an avid World of Warcraft player. I have a level 60 mage, level 53 paladin and multiple level 20 somethings. I have spent hours upon days playing these characters, levelling up, and building reputation with other races. To some of you this might seem Palauan (a lauguage of a small country of islands in the north Pacific), but to the avid WoW player, there is extensive time and effort included in each character. Since becoming a blogger...my name is John... I am an addict...I have found that there are actually other humans out there. I also realize that the last year of gaming was a complete waste of time and money ($15/month). After all, that 15 bucks could be my next turkey sandwich! Therefore, as my first resolution f

Another Article from Reuters Oddly Enough prompted this thought. What the hell are they thinking? There is absolutely no way I would take a swim in a 36 degree lake for 1 second, let alone 1, 10 or 15 minutes! How is it possible that these people do not have their joints lock up, muscles tighten and their genitals not crawl well into the lungs? I realize that there are some mentally unstable people out there who think that this is fun. When I get in the shower after the hot water is used up, first I scream like a girl, then I curl into the fetal position, and promptly crawl out. I can wait for the water to warm back up. It is much better than having my voice go from baritone to soprano. So, how many of you have done the polar bear swim? How many of you still do the polar bear swim? Naked in a freezing lake for good health Mon Dec 26, 9:22 AM ET Saying ice cold water is good for their health, a group of about 30 naked Germans jumped together into a Berlin lake for their annual Christmas

Christmas morning has has come and gone. We were awakened by Avery singing Frosty the Snowman. Andi woke up all excited ready to queue the children at the top of the stairs for the great descent down to the living room where the Dora's Talking Kitchen stood. Cameras at the ready, they sllllooooowwwwllllyyyy came down. I think it was more frustrating to us than them. They get to the bottom of the steps, and Avery slowly walks over to Dora's Talking Kitchene and fumbles with the knobs. Andi exclaims "Santa brought you Dora's Talking Kitchen!" Avery responded with a smile (not quite elated) with "Yeah." What a huge disappointment. The digital camera Shae begged us for and the sewing machine Sydni nagged us about were not even noticed. They walked over and nothing... if it were summer, you could have heard the crickets chirp. I am not sure if it was just too early for brains to kick in, or what. Avery and Andi really made out this Christmas. Avery had the D

Well, Avery was tucked in bed. After checking the video monitor, I removed the Dora's Talking Kitchen from the tightly packed box. I had it in my mind right from the start that putting this together the kitchen was going to be like building the Statue of Liberty with duct tape. In preparation I got out my toolbox, my laptop for the AltaVista translator, and every picture available of the Dora's talking kitchen to compare it. So, I removed the tightly packed materials and began the search for the instructions. Of course, I can't find them. So, I spread all 25 pieces of the kitchen all over the floor and noticed something taped to the back of the largest piece of the construction set. What could it be? WOOOHOOO! The instruction set! I promptly opened my laptop to start the Chinese translation and to my surprise, IT'S IN ENGLISH! WITH BIG PICTURES! AND THE STEPS ARE SMALL! I can't believe it. I assembled according to the directions (which were right), and screwed in th

This post is a spin off to a post by MyLifeAndWorld . This guy is a good blogger. Isn't it odd how the human body can all of a sudden decide it needs a nap? I have a theory about the human body I wish to express right now. When you are first born, the human body can't survive without the help of others. The reason for this is cognitive function is not fully developed. This means that the baby needs diapers, long naps, and someone to help feed and clothe them. Without this help, the child would (morbid as this may be) discontinue life. The child often faces memory issues especially into his or her teens. This is reflected by the very common terms "I can't remember" and "I don't know." This is due to the brain still going through a developmental phase. Through the young adult and middle-aged portions of life, people appear to have higher cognitive abilities even when they abuse of their bodies with alcohol and stupid human tricks. They no longer have t

I added music to the website only for only a couple days. I am trying to get into the Christmas spirit. I added a holiday song from one of my favorite performers, Douglas Spotted Eagle ( www.spottedeagle.com ). I will be blogging throughout the holiday mostly because I think I am becoming addicted to blogging. I really appreciate reading other peoples weblogs, getting their points of view, and finally being able to get all of the crap that is in my head out. I consider this a kind of therapy. My wife says it is more like me starting to get social. She may be right. For the past year, I have been using World of Warcraft to "detox" from work and the stresses of life. Andi calls the game the monkey slapping game although there are no monkeys and very little slapping. I guess that better than monkey spanking game. I have been trying to figure a lot of things out in my head, and the game often lets me just shut it out, that is until issues rear their ugly head again and I have to

There is always some point in parenthood you think well into a decision, Oh shit. We all took a jaunt down to Navy Pier last weekend to see the Winter Wonderland and Santa Claus. Two years ago we made this trek and had a great time. But now, Avery is two years old and she is loving the lights, festival and wonder of the holiday season. The bouncy areas, ice skating, train ride were all fantastic and Avery was burning down as time continued. After about 3 hours, Andi was ready to take Avery to get the Frosty at Build-a-Bear workshop. Build-a-bear was packed and also uncomfortably close to Mr. and Mrs. Claus. Frosty (Avery's favorite snowman of all time) was stuffed, given a heart, stitched and clothed. So while Andi was fighting and elbowing the other parents and kids inside, my mission was to watch for the jolly fat guy in a red suit. About the time Andi and Avery exited the store, Santa and Mrs. Claus arrived for the costly photo opportunities. While in line, Andi made friends wit

I want to go bowling. I can't possibly be alone in the rationalization that I am wasting space. I better explain. For quite some time I have felt as though my sole purpose here is to provide funding and male role model for my girls. There are times that I truly enjoy my job. But when I look around at what I have really accomplished that may have made a difference in someone's life, I see nothing. I don't golf, I am not someone with a substantial amount of money, and I do not contribute to the community or the human race a whole lot. This lack of involvement was quietly pointed out to me by my wife as Christmas comes closer. I don't attend church (I have a real issue with organized religion). It is not that I don't want to make a difference, more the fact I don't feel like making a difference. I am really in a defensive mental posture right now. I wake up after a restless night of sleep, drudge my ass to work with the gruelling 2 to 2 1/2 hour commute, only to ar

I often have to read. It is necessary for my job, raising children, even just when I am sitting around watching TV. As I age though, I am wondering what is happening to the English language. I don't blame the students. I blame the educational system. With the "no kid left behind" belief, I feel a few important details are often missed. This issue affects more than just English. Let me expound: Strawberry sundae, not sunday You eat doughnuts from Dunkin Donuts. Donuts is part of a name. This is simular to catsup and Ketchup. The word "got" should never be used. For Pete's sake, do not use "gots." Stop ending sentences with adverbs that end with "ly." The period at the end of a sentence is placed inside the end quote. You jury-rig something. There are 15 uses for the word " capital " and 2 for " capitol ." Capitol Records is a proper name. Etcetera is etc. The word ask is pronouced (sk). I do not want you to axe me...eve