I like my boss...really
I have worked for myself and work for other people. Most of the time, working for other people is a real pain. But my boss is not so bad. He takes the blunt end of the stick from the Wicked Witch of the North, and still manages to come out the other side. I am in IT Operations. Now most of you probably have no idea what that means. Well, in a nut shell, my job is to make sure the computer systems (like your PC), the applications running on the systems (somewhat like MS Office on your home PC) and the custom applications (somewhat like your budget spreadsheet) all work, all of the time. The difference between you managing your home PC and me managing my systems is kind of like having a roll of duct tape that can reach the moon. My “spreadsheet” is measured in hundreds of billions of dollars. My “MS Office” requires about 30 employees to keep it running. My “PC” requires 15 clothes dryer outlets and 120 standard home outlets. The main difference is you can turn your PC off. I can’t. Mine have to be up every minute of every hour of every day of every year. Non-stop.
So, when there is a problem with the “spreadsheet”, I have to well, lets just say, it will be easier to go to the doctor on my 40th birthday. The Wicked Witch and one of her flying monkeys tend to take any issue and throw it completely out of proportion.
For example:
Wicked Witch: What does this mean? Does this mean we are not able to add? How does my hair look?
Flying Monkey: No, Wicked Witch. This means that the booming voice of doom is going to keep you up all night thinking about this. This is serious! Your hair is a mess.
Wicked Witch: Well let’s go get the little dog and put it on my head so it can cover my hair.
Toto (My boss): Yes your greenness?
Wicked Witch: Get on my head…oh, and is it true that the world will end because of this problem with the spreadsheet?
Toto: Um, No and No. Why would you believe something from a flying monkey who knows diddly squat about what my group does?
Wicked Witch: Oh, OK. The flying monkey has been here for ever. How does my hair look?
Toto: Looks great. The problem only affects one part of the spreadsheet. It is not vital and we can live without it. Now, hop on your broom and go.
My boss is good but has his downfalls. He is a closet procrastinator. Today I was told to provide him a years worth of information on all of my employees. He informs me this morning at 8. He has to have it by the end of the day. He needs numbers by 10:30 for a meeting with the Wicked Witch.
Now, I knew this was coming, so it is not a big surprise. But I try to follow a protocol. I do what I am told, when I am told as to not upset Toto. I had completed a majority of the request, just not all of it. So, when he asked for it, I had to finish a few and send them on their merry way.
Planning for this often is circumvented by real work. As much as I appreciate the paperwork aspect of my job, people actually require me to do real work. So while I was on the phone with the Tin Man, I received an email stating “Where’s my number’s on The Wizard?” Well, he just happened to pick the one I had yet to complete.
My response went something like this. “You just transferred the Wizard to me a couple months ago. Can you send me what you have so far on him?”
Do you ever have email that you send and it is sort of like when you pick up a ringing phone to hear dial tone? That’s what I received. A blank form. Hmm…
This brings me to my point (as I always have one). Push your work onto someone ELSE! Why do it yourself when you can pass it off on the perfectionist to do. If he does it wrong, well, that is HIS fault. Always wait until the last minute so he will surely fail. If you really want to get rid of this stooge, don’t even tell him you gave him the task and say he didn’t complete it. He will LOVE THAT! Ok, I need to go delegate.
So, when there is a problem with the “spreadsheet”, I have to well, lets just say, it will be easier to go to the doctor on my 40th birthday. The Wicked Witch and one of her flying monkeys tend to take any issue and throw it completely out of proportion.
For example:
Wicked Witch: What does this mean? Does this mean we are not able to add? How does my hair look?
Flying Monkey: No, Wicked Witch. This means that the booming voice of doom is going to keep you up all night thinking about this. This is serious! Your hair is a mess.
Wicked Witch: Well let’s go get the little dog and put it on my head so it can cover my hair.
Toto (My boss): Yes your greenness?
Wicked Witch: Get on my head…oh, and is it true that the world will end because of this problem with the spreadsheet?
Toto: Um, No and No. Why would you believe something from a flying monkey who knows diddly squat about what my group does?
Wicked Witch: Oh, OK. The flying monkey has been here for ever. How does my hair look?
Toto: Looks great. The problem only affects one part of the spreadsheet. It is not vital and we can live without it. Now, hop on your broom and go.
My boss is good but has his downfalls. He is a closet procrastinator. Today I was told to provide him a years worth of information on all of my employees. He informs me this morning at 8. He has to have it by the end of the day. He needs numbers by 10:30 for a meeting with the Wicked Witch.
Now, I knew this was coming, so it is not a big surprise. But I try to follow a protocol. I do what I am told, when I am told as to not upset Toto. I had completed a majority of the request, just not all of it. So, when he asked for it, I had to finish a few and send them on their merry way.
Planning for this often is circumvented by real work. As much as I appreciate the paperwork aspect of my job, people actually require me to do real work. So while I was on the phone with the Tin Man, I received an email stating “Where’s my number’s on The Wizard?” Well, he just happened to pick the one I had yet to complete.
My response went something like this. “You just transferred the Wizard to me a couple months ago. Can you send me what you have so far on him?”
Do you ever have email that you send and it is sort of like when you pick up a ringing phone to hear dial tone? That’s what I received. A blank form. Hmm…
This brings me to my point (as I always have one). Push your work onto someone ELSE! Why do it yourself when you can pass it off on the perfectionist to do. If he does it wrong, well, that is HIS fault. Always wait until the last minute so he will surely fail. If you really want to get rid of this stooge, don’t even tell him you gave him the task and say he didn’t complete it. He will LOVE THAT! Ok, I need to go delegate.
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